I wasn’t wild about my poem from the 3rd. It was still too observational, not personal enough. I felt uncomfortable about writing something from someone else’s perspective, with someone else’s voice. It felt like it would be less authentic, like I was trying to fool someone because my own voice lacked. So, for tonight, I wanted to push my boundaries and try to write something that wasn’t about what I have personally experienced, but also wanted to take a comfortable step toward writing from ‘the other’ and have chosen to write about a star.
I can feel my silicon molecules quivering in my core again.
Exhale… let my photons and neutrinos scatter across the heavens.
Inhale… and it tickles my iron heart, makes my chromosphere flutter and spurt.
I’ve felt this before. Every time my heart has been broken.
And each time I have shone brighter, lived more fully, grown stronger.
I knew I could exhale and extend my outer layers, keep extending
until there was nothing left to give, until I died a small blackened husk.
But this time, I realize, finally, that it is not about me not being
good enough at what I do – nourishing, guiding, giving warmth.
This time I know I must transform myself from the inside.
I must reach deep into my core and crack myself open.
I must jettison my bad parts and spread my love across the
universe in a shower of gold and purple sparkles.